![]() ![]() For most, they can be major changes in interests and values. For some people, there may be subtle changes. ![]() It is inevitable that people’s interests and values change over time. Is it okay to say your interests or values have changed and you want to spend more time with your family or other friends? One of the best techniques that I use to say no to someone is to say something like “If I said yes to that, I’m afraid I’d let you down.” You may say that because you don’t have the bandwidth, the knowledge or the expertise to do what they are asking but in any case, you’re not the person to do what they are asking. Learning to say “no” is an important skill in setting boundaries. Simply state your boundaries clearly and politely, and then stand firm. Why? Because it is inevitable that people will try to encroach. Worse yet, many people don’t communicate those boundaries to others.ĭon’t make apologies for the boundaries and don’t get mad when people want to encroach upon them. Most people don’t enforce the boundaries they desire in life. See Also: 5 Signs You Need to Start Removing Toxic People How do you address personal boundaries with your friends? When this happens, you’ll need a break from interacting with that individual. When values are “dissonant” with each other, it creates varying levels of frustration and even conflict. ![]() Diversity is valuable, however, the values need to be “resonant” with one another. Personal values don’t have to be exactly the same. This is particularly true when the two of you have personal values that are not in alignment. Yes, this is not uncommon for most individuals. Are there times when you just need a break from some people? This is the minimal interaction necessary to address the individual over time”. Simply, don’t engage as often or engage in what we call “homeopathic doses. Doing that allows someone else to step closer in your life.Īs a rule, there’s no need to burn bridges. One of the ways to restrict access without angering someone or burning bridges is called “benign neglect.” This involves any decision you make that allows a person in your life (or an activity associated with that person) to move toward the back. However, if you make easy decisions upfront, they become harder for you down the road. When you make hard decisions up front, things become easier for you later. My answer to that is this: “True, and it’s easier than living with the results when you don’t.” When I tell some people that, they often say something like “but that’s not easy to do.” What can you do when you just don’t like being around certain friends anymore? If you find yourself in that situation, here are some things to consider. Unfortunately, getting out of social engagements and relationships can be a delicate thing to maneuver. Whether it’s you who has changed or it’s them, it’s completely normal for social interests to shift as we age. Whether it’s a fantasy football league, a book club or your happy hour crew, there may come a time when you feel the need to move on from social groups that no longer make you happy. ![]()
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